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IReallyAmVidel
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Name: Melissa
Gender: Female
Interests: Bible study, reading books, hanging out with my friends, basketball, Track & Field, the Bible, God, church, DOGS, jewelry, eating pasta, music; Christian lyric, movies, and most importantly my Savior, Jesus Christ
Expertise: Animals/ Dogs
Occupation: Student
Message: message me
Member Since:
1/31/2004
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| The past week has probably been the lowest part of my life. Who would have thought so many obstacles could come all in the same week? I don't even know where to begin or how much I want to say...this feeling started two Mondays ago. I had a feeling that this would happen yet I didn't actually think it would. I still don't understand. How could he do this to me? To my brothers? And especially to my mom? Monday was one of the worst. After hearing the news from Nathaniel at dinner...I couldn't think. I was so angry and I couldn't take it. I had midterms to study for. Why? Why now? How could he? I couldn't talk to him when he called me. I said I was eating dinner and that I will call him back. I wasn't lying. I was eating dinner with some friends. I couldn't call him back. I am not that brave. I couldn't do it. I just couldn't and I didn't. Going back to my dorm...I couldn't even go to my Campus Crusade Girls' Bible Study in my dorm that night since I was in a complete disaster. My eyes were red from crying for two or so hours. I couldn't even studying for my midterms yet I am so grateful for my best friend. Alex, I can't thank you enough for being here for me. I thank you for you just listening to me when I am at my lowest...it seems that it is really true...family and friends will come and go, but the one who will always be there no matter what is you, Lord. Lord...I know you are breaking me down this past week and it still continues on. I know that even though I tell myself that I can not handle anymore Lord...I remember that you will never give us anything too much that we can not handle. The last few days has even been harder. I feel that I have been betrayed without any reasons to why she did this. I don't understand. You could have told me sooner. You even have room for me yet I don't understand why I can't join you. I guess I will never know why. I want our friendship to still be the same...God...I trust that you will watch over her. I give her up to you and provide her with someone else to guide her to the Truth. I told her that if this is what she wants then ok...just know that I will only be here for her no matter what. It hurts...but I have to trust you Lord and not what I want.
Thank you all who has helped me through my lowest point.
The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed
in spirit. A righteous man may have many troubles, but the LORD
delivers him from them all. ~Psalm 34:18-19
Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you. ~Psalm 9:10
Lord, I know that you will never forsake me. I pray to you that all these trials will build me to be stronger in You. I pray that you will teach me what you want me to learn through these trials. I can't thank you enough for your mercy and grace...help me through these tough times.
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| I am so excited for Thanksgiving break! I get to go home in FIVE days!! I get to see my huggable doggie and of course my family. :) I miss him, but will be home soon. I can't believe that it is Thanksgiving time...the quarter is almost over for me. After Thanksgiving week...one more week (10th of the quarter) and then the week after are finals! That is scary! Too bad I have a final on the 7th...but then I have one whole month off. YAY! I can't wait!...but seriously I am thinking a little bit too far ahead in a way. I need to focus on passing my classes. lol
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| God has blessed me at Cal Poly. Arriving at Cal Poly back in September, it seems too long ago. I feel like I been down in SLO for a long time. The transition from high school to college was something I never really thought about. It just happened. College is a lot better than high school and different in many aspects. College life has definitely shaped me in becoming more independent and to seek out God's Word daily. I am excited for what God has in store for me. After fellowship hopping I have decided CCF: Chinese Christian Fellowship is the fellowship in which has shown me God's love and the place where I believe I can grow spiritually closer to my Lord and Savior. I am still in the process of church hopping....still narrowing down. I just hope to finish my first quarter without going on AP.
CCF Theme Verse:
"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility
consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not
only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others."
Philippians 2:3-4
I miss my doggie!
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| Summer has gone by too quickly. I remembered not too long ago my friends and I were waiting for that day when we graduated high school. I can't believe it is already September...time to go back to school, but this time it is different. I am not going back to the same school, but starting a new journey in a new town: San Luis Obispo. I am so blessed that God has given me this opportunity to be educated at Cal Poly. Here today...my last day here before college in my home area...it was not something I would ever have imagined it to be like. I woke up around 6:30 am to get ready to drive my brother to school. I usually would go back home but then I went to Target with my mom and later went back to my old house to move more boxes. I spent basically my whole day moving...which I didn't plan on doing...even was late to my last day of work. My last day of work was bittersweet...two of the agents were so kind and remembered my last day giving me presents. Both wishing I wasn't leaving for I been working there for three years. All those familiar faces...I will miss. My boss came near the end of my shift and talked to me about what I was going to do with my faith down in college. The way he phrased it was kind of weird, but I told him about the different churches and the Bible studies that I will be visiting and how finding one is on the top of my list. It was sad to leave Better Homes Realty after basically growing up there my whole childhood yet alone worked there for 3 years. Handing back my key to the office was weird. I was thinking inside 'wow, I am actually leaving...this is my last day here before college...no more making listing packets...no more being bored on my Saturday mornings'...lol Later on I was late to my last day at SOS (Seeking Our Savior), my youth group...I had to do a lot of errands and go back to my old house to eat and such. It was different today...felt different than usual. Maybe because a lot of people weren't there...not sure why. Right now I am dealing all sorts of mix feelings...my mom for one...missing my doggie when I am away...I just pray that as I go down to Cal Poly...I don't have be responsible for her actions...I can live my life without all those boundaries and the stress she makes me feel. As I will continue my walk with the Lord ... I am just sad to leaving my friends from Rollings Hills and SOS. May God bless all of you! I will miss you. See you all Thanksgiving or maybe even sooner---for my dog's sake. Off to pack...
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| I've been pretty busy lately with moving to a new house along with getting ready to leave for college. It makes me more tired packing and unpacking everything...I think it is because we don't have a lot of help. My mom and I basically did all the moving since my brother is just too tired to help from work. At least I have this week to settle in a bit before I move again down to SLO. I am pretty excited moving down to Cal Poly, but it just seems so unreal. I've been wishing to go to college for the longest time yet there is a little part of me that is scared of 'college'. Plus, I will definitely miss my DOGGIE!  I hope I don't forget anything as I pack for college.
Feeling a bit unease today...
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